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Interpersonal-Communication Essentials
HOW TO LISTEN, AND LISTEN WELL We at Ivy Sea have many articles on how to listen well, and each one points out that, while most people want to be listened to, most of us are challenged when it comes to listening to others. Would you believe, though, that listening skillfully — really listening — can be fun and satisfying for us, as well as rewarding and pleasant for others? Try it. To listen skillfully, deeply and well, you may need to break an old habit of waiting to speak. Today, when you have the chance to really listen to someone else, start by intending to listen well. Tell yourself that you really want to hear what this other person has to say. Sounds simple, and it is, but most people speak without an intention to listen! Once you've decided to listen well, relax into the conversation and prepare to enjoy listening. Can you feel that in your body, that decision to relax and enjoy? It's different from approaching a conversation with dread, impatience, or arrogance, isn't it? As you relax and listen, focus on really hearing what the person is saying. Don't fake "listening steps", just allow your natural interpersonal genius to guide you to the right pace and timing. If you feel moved to repeat something that someone has said, do so. If you have a question or want to make sure you've heard something correctly, ask. Before you end the conversation, sum up what you are taking with you or what key point you are walking away with. And a great way to end a conversation is to express gratitude for it; pass along your thanks to the person who has shared his or her time and thoughts with you. Isn't it nice when someone sincerely tells you that it's been nice to talk with you? Chances are good that they felt this way because they felt listened to. How is this different from your usual conversations? For more tips on conscious, skillful listening, inquiry, and overall communication, visit some of the other Ivy Sea Online resources listed below. Why wait to improve your personal and organizational communication effectiveness? Become a VIP Member Center subscriber, or check out "Workplace Communication Essentials" or "Skillful Communication Essentials" PDF skill-building tip kits and workbooks. More information please... |
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VIP Member Center: Increase skillfulness and support personal and professional development with VIP resources: Ivy Sea VIP Members get access to a special "VIP-only" collection of html and PDF articles, tip sheets, vision-catalysts, and dialogue-starters. Gold and Platinum-level VIPs also get permission to reprint and distribute from Ivy Sea's online library of copyright-protected skill-building materials for training, development, intranet, and communication programs, with easy online access. Becoming a VIP is as easy as can be! Find out more about our VIP Membership. |
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